Valentine's Insanity

Every classroom needs a suck-mom. You know, that mom who never contributes, and her kids always have the crappiest stuff. And this Valentine's Day, I am wearing the suck-mom crown and sash big time. I have to admit that I'm not really in to Valentine's Day. I don't see the need for a bunch of cards, candy, balloon bouquets and fuzzy stuffed animals with big eyes, clutching a heart. And it was never a huge deal when I was growing up. My parents gave us a card and a small box of candy and we exchanged paper valentines with the kids at school. Maybe you'd get really lucky and someone would toss in a box of conversation hearts. But that was about all for Valentine's Day, and that was okay with me. But somehow, in the years (okay, decades) since I was a kid, Valentine's has turned into a huge production.

Not so much at our house- the kids got a little toy and I made each one a card. I did cut Mason's sandwich into a heart shape and made them a funfetti cake, but that's about as far as Matt and I went. In my opinion, that alone would have made for a good Valentine's Day. But those were mere pebbles in the Valentine's avalanche that followed. They got Valentine's presents from all of their grandparents, so stuff was starting to add up. But then they went to school.

Someone please tell me, when the heck did it become customary for EVERY SINGLE KID to include candy with their valentines??? Mason's Valentine bag looked like dadgum Willy Wonka's factory. It was crazy- but it didn't even hold a candle to the twins' nursery school haul. Not only did almost every child include some sort of candy, over half of them made up goody bags!! WTF??? This is preschool- they don't need five pounds of candy! I seriously think they got more candy today than they did at Halloween.

It's ridiculous, and I refuse to buy into it. Therefore, I am the suck mom. I did not put candy with Mason's valentines. I did bend a little bit to peer pressure and got valentines that included tattoos- he's old enough to realize if his valentines suck, and I don't want to embarrass the poor guy. The twins, however, are not old enough to be aware of, or care about the suckiness of their valentines. And since I don't believe in giving toddlers tons of candy, I didn't include any. And their valentines consisted of pink paper cut into hearts on which I wrote "Happy Valentine's Day! Love, Will and Hays" I had planned on letting them decorate them with crayons, but when I said "let's decorate your valentines!" they laughed at me and said no. If they don't care, why should I?

I almost gave in when I took them to school and saw the extravagant valentines the other kids brought. I had to go to Party City this morning to get some stuff for their birthday (which will be a whole other post about how much I suck), and I almost caved and bought some pink and red, heart-covered crap to make up goody bags. But I stood firm. I thought to myself, "I only spent $5 on my own kids. Why would I spend $25 to buy a bunch of plastic crap- that's not even discounted even though it's the day after valentines- for kids that couldn't care less? So I didn't. And I'm totally okay with being one of only three families that didn't load up the preschoolers with sugar. In fact, I consider that my Valentine's gift to their moms.