The Amazing Twin Adventure: How Weekend Renovations Almost Destroyed My Marriage- Tales from the DIY Dark Side

My marriage has survived a lot of things. It has survived being so dirt-poor that I lay awake at night wondering how we would pay the bills. It has survived having a critically ill child hospitalized for months. It has (thus far) survived parenting three of the wildest boys alive. However, it almost didn't survive my latest DIY undertaking.

I have spring project fever, and redecorating Mason's room just wasn't enough to quell it, so I decided to renovate our hideous laundry room. I think it was the only remaining untouched space in our house, and I decided that I was going to make it cute. And Matt, being the loving supportive husband that he is, fully approved of my plan- even though this one would require his help. Well, I'm not sure if it was because he's so loving and supportive or because he hated the laundry room almost as much as I did. But either way, he agreed. So after trolling Pinterest and googling cute laundry rooms, I came up with my brilliant design plan and gathered supplies.

In my haste to get started, I forgot to take before pictures, so you'll just have to imagine it as it was- 6'x3' closet with ugly, water-damaged linoleum, two long shelves on the back wall, and ugly wire shelves on the side. It was ugly. And beige. And messy. And ugly. But I had big plans for this glorified closet. Plans involving stenciled cabinets, a counter over the washer and dryer, and a shiny new floor. And I wanted to get it all done in a weekend for less than $250.

I bought inexpensive unfinished cabinets and started painting them on Friday. I had found an awesome quatrefoil stencil online (http://thecsiproject.com/2010/05/18/jens-quatrefoil-paint-projects-free-printable-stencil/) and I just knew it was going to look fabulous. What I didn't know was that it was going to take HOURS (6 to be precise) It's a simple stencil, but it's very geometric and requires a lot of precision. And a lot of touching up with a tiny artists brush. I was so cramped and achy after hunching over those things for two days, but by Saturday night they were finished and gorgeous.

You're probably wondering where the marriage-destroying part comes in. Well, I guess you could say it started Saturday morning. I needed Matt's help moving the washer and dryer out. No big deal- other than the fact that it turned the kitchen into a disastrous obstacle course. But I could live with that. What killed me was the painting. Matt was going to paint while I took Mason to soccer practice. I figured he'd knock it out in no time. After all, I'd put a first coat on every part of the wall that I could reach before we moved the washer and dryer. I was wrong.

By the time I got back, he'd painted it (sort of), but it was all patchy and uneven, and he hadn't bothered to cut in at the trim or corners. I was a bit dismayed (after all, I can paint an entire room in a couple of hours!), but I wasn't ready to call the attorney just yet. I even kept a (relatively) cool head every time he said "I've got a great idea!" Even though his ideas were brilliant gems like "let's put a drawer in that inch of space between the counter and the washer!" Ummm, really? A drawer that's less than an inch deep, and can only be pulled out three inches before hitting the wall? That doesn't sound super-useful....

But by Sunday evening, I was thinking about packing my bags. We had soooooo much left to do, and my weekend deadline was closing in fast. I was ready to work like a monkey on speed. Matt was ready to work, but I can tell you, it did not involve anything even resembling speed. I have never seen anyone work more slowly in my entire life. Matt does everything at a tortoise-like pace, and it's always made my jackrabbit self a bit crazy, but this just about put me over the edge. He'd meander over and pick up a hammer, wander back and drive one nail, stand and look at it for a minute, hum a little tune...... HE WAS MAKING ME INSANE!!!!!!

In a single day's time, we had to finish painting, lay the vinyl tile floor, hang the cabinets, secure the counter on the supports he'd installed the night before, put the trim on the counter, and stain it, move the appliances back in and hook them back up, and return the kitchen to a semi-functioning state. That's a lot of stuff to accomplish in one day, especially when one-half of the DIY team is moving at the speed of molasses! But somehow, we got it done. I was clenching my teeth and casting murderous glances his way the entire time, but we got it done.

It wasn't officially finished by the end of the weekend. I didn't finish making the art until Monday, and I didn't get everything hung up until Tuesday. And since we still haven't put the new doors on, I guess we can't call it officially finished. And I probably went over my budget by about $50. So I can't declare this a total DIY win, but pretty darn close. And the best part- Matt and I are still married. Happily now that we're not trying to do a project together!